mothers

Dear Mothers: Who Do You Say You Are?

Dear Mothers: Who Do You Say You Are?

Dear Ladies ~

Is it just me? Am I the only one? Are there any other women offended by the label, baby mama?

No matter how our children came to be, we are not baby mamas. We are mothers. The connotation associated with baby mama is negative and feeds into a stereotype placed upon us by others.

No matter how our children came to be, we are not baby mamas. We are mothers. The connotation associated with baby mama is negative and feeds into a stereotype placed upon us by others.

mothersWe are mothers and that’s an honor! The derogatory label of baby mama taints that honor. We have been blessed with children to care for, to nurture, and to protect. In our hands are human lives to guide and direct. It is a privilege to be a mother. Being a mother is something to be respected not degraded. “Steve’s baby mama” sounds more like someone is referring to Steve’s property than the source of a child’s strength, safety, and love.

“Are you Kevin’s baby mama?” The baby mama label keeps the focus on the man involved. It gives more prominence to the man than the child or the mother. I’m not knocking a father’s importance; I simply desire to see mothers, fathers, and children referred to respectfully, regardless of the family structure.

The term has become so widely accepted that even Michelle Obama was once referred to as Barack’s baby mama. She is Barack’s wife and the mother of his children…not a baby mama. I can’t speak for Michelle so I don’t know if it bothered her or not. However, I don’t think that was a fitting title for the First Lady of the United States.

Too often we let others place labels on us that we don’t have to accept. I understand if the term baby mama does not offend you. We all have personal preferences. I can accept and respect your choice. But if it offends me, please respect that as well.

I went to the salon one day. When I walked in, a stylist looked at me and said, “Are you so-and-so’s baby mama”. Not only did she have me associated with the wrong man, but I was quite offended. I am Jordan’s mother. She calls me Mommy and, one day, I look forward to her children calling me Grandma or Nana but I am not a baby mama.

Our pride in being a mother should be focused on the child, not the father of the child. We are beautiful, intelligent women. Our role in the development of our children is too critical to diminish or disrespect. We should hold ourselves in higher regard than to be referred to in this manner, or refer to ourselves as such.

Signed,

Jordan’s Mother

Shawn-Ta Wilson is the author “Survival by Faith”. Purchase your copy on Amazon.com today!

Survival by Faith is a great read! Shawn-Ta Sterns Wilson takes you on a journey through her life, generously sharing real-life vivid details of her experiences. It is evident throughout the book that she relied on The Lord Jesus Christ for all of her needs, to get her and her family through tumultuous situations. Although this book is spiritual in nature, anyone can connect with Shawn-Ta’s character and integrity. Her display of affection for others was refreshing to experience but her genuine love for God was uplifting. There are relatable scriptures sprinkled throughout the book which adds a nice touch. Not only is this story entertaining but also inspirational. The strong emotions of the author shines through each page and the words flow from one story to the next, keeping you enthralled and wanting more.